Dangerously Boring (ilielots) wrote, @ 2004-08-17 23:36:00

Current mood:

cynical

In Case You Wonder Where I Get It From...
Dad: Hey! You! Clean the catbox, it smells like urine.

Me: But I thought you liked the smell of urine. The stench adds to the general ambiance of 'squallor and pestilence'.

Dad: I can't wait 'till I'm old so I can soil my adult diapers with feces and urine so a hot nurse will come in and change my diaper, giving me a little bit of morning wood.

Me: Dad, when you're that old, you won't even be able to get morning wood.

Dad: (blinks) ...What? Susan, where the hell does she learn this shit?

Me: I learned it from watching you!


"Would you eat a rectal thermometer?...I would. Ah, mercury, sweetest of the transition metals."
-Sealab 2021

"Idle hands spend time at the genitals,and you know how much God hates that."
-Brak

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