|Current mood:|| blank|
"I've longed to discover something as true as this is..."
So I've decided... I'm a very hard girl to keep. I'm not saying that I'm difficult, or high-maintenance, but the fact of the matter is... I'm hard to keep. I can't seem to grasp the concept of an attachment to myself, or anything that has to do with me. I don't think it's low self-esteem persay, though that may have something to do with it. I simply need a little more *emotionally* to make me feel cared about.
I sort of had this thought in my mind for a while now (try like 4 years), but I can forget about it.. Until I'm reminded in some way how convinced I am that this same thought is why my past relationships haven't worked.
And also why I haven't had more.
There is so much that I wish I could tell you
Feelings that I've had buried inside my soul
The same soul that I've tried to deny any presence of
Since the day we've met
But I am scared
Scared of having too many feelings and too fast
Scared of never having those feelings reciprocated
I am scared of never feeling like they have been reciprocated
I am terrified that
You will care for me
That you'll... Love me
And I won't be able to understand