|Current mood:|| disappointed|
|Current music:||letters to you - finch|
ahhhh damnit !!
ahhhh god damnit why does this always happen ?! everyone always tells me that colin`s shit talking me, but then whe i ask him, he completely denies it and says that they`re all lying. ughh i just don`t know anymore.
col - if you`re reading this ...
you were one of my closest friends, and the best boyfriend i could have asked for, but when we broke up, something changed. just put yourself in my position for a minute. what am i supposed to do ?! everyone`s telling me one thing, but you`re telling me another. you have no idea how badly i want to believe you, and i always have .. but how can i now ? i don`t want to lose you as my friend, but i know it`s happening and i hate it so much. you`ve been there for me through it all, but honestly colin, you haven`t really been there for me lately. sure we joke around about things (5.3 -- best joke EVER) .. and if i tell you to be serious, you will, but it`s not the same. i just, miss how it used to be when you were there for everything, and i didn`t have to ask you to be there. you just always seemed to be there at the right time. i don`t know what happened to you those months after we boke up .. but i want my old colin back. :o(