|Current mood:|| anxious|
I haven't written in a few days. I don't mean to do that. Things just get hectic or I forget. But I really want to keep a journal of my relationship with Mei. It helps me see the progress and/or where I've been and how I've dealt with things...good or bad.
Mei had a scream fest for over an hour a couple of days ago during holding time because I prevented her from putting her fingers in her mouth...and so she was required to take comfort in me instead. That was something she didn't want to do. She did finally calm down and then became VERY happy. I was a wreck. But that holding time is really something.
Today I tried it again and she didn't cry even a fraction as much. I am teaching her to touch my face gently. She is getting the hang of it, though she still sometimes pinches or scratches, but not viciously, I don't think. She just doesn't know what is gentle and what hurts.
Actually today is a better day than any other day this week. Mondays are always the worst, as I have probably written before. That's because on the weekend her father is here and all bets are off. She becomes a real jerk. Hate to call her that. But that's the word that seems to describe her. Or perhaps spoiled brat is better. But anyway...we're trying to avoid the triangulation that happens. She's a clever little thing.