|Current mood:|| discontent|
|Current music:||my chemical romance- demolition lovers|
hello everyone and yes i am alive
sorry for no updation( word? didnt think so) mario and celeste are spending the weekend with my mom and they left me here all alone with the devil during his peak of asshole-ness( get it? devils..peak? gosh im on fire..haha fire...devil! aaand im done)at first just celeste was going for tonight but i get lost in a book and by the time i look up they're both saying bye and that they'll be back on sunday til noon...urg i dont feel good enough to go anyways
yea so my english teacher gave me another book to read..i read this one in a few hours because i had nothing better to do...apparently im grounded for leaving the garage door open when i went to the adams talent show..did i mention that it was open for 5 minutes until my father got home and he called me numerous times to scream at me and finally got ahold of me when tyler was taking me home...where i cried and was very sad until my dad to informed me i was grounded all weekend and the agony bloomed into acute devastation?enough said about that..ill escape someday
yes so my only company i have is the saltine-chomping lullaby im creating along with the devil snoring upstairs...im embracing this lonliness with surprising lack of hesitation..i think i needed to be alone for a while and sort of catch up with myself...
ive been so itchy in this skin lately..its time for a new skin bag..im just not content
the books ive been reading have been amazing..and i got new cd's lately as well...luckily im not as sad as i usually am for the grounded weekend time..i need to write a story or something im just frustrated..i stopped writing poems lately because all that damn symbolism bullshit has been distorting what ive really wanted to say for a long time...next thought
today the number of people i usually ride home with was cut in half, so it was just me and 2 older guys in the front..i was forced to listen to this snobby little fucker tell me how different i am and that im a freak...his surpressed arrogance was just oozing out of his pointy little demon ears...im used to people letting the words "youre different" slip out of their tight lipped thoughts, but truly offensive, it is not...the little line about being a freak made my insides stir just a little though..ive never endured such a long car ride...i hope they choke on their little abercrombie shell necklaces
on top of this pleasant chain of events, im sick and have been wheezing for the past couple hours..my throat is killing me..weather is killing me..its winter in disguise and i hate it...it was fall for approximately 3 days...
schools been fairly routine each day..i arrive with wet hair and a shitty attitude..i leave with dry hair and a shitty attitude..ah the magic of adolescence
who knows maybe the silence will choke me and ill be spilling my guts again in another couple hours..until then...