Recently I have been thinking how stupid I really was to screw up my relationship with my one exboyfriend, it was almost a year before I tried to blue it they he broke up after I messed with his mind. I hope now he is really happy cuz I have just felt so bad for what I have done, he was the only person who mad me feel needed and happy. Now, I am happy, but now there is now guy and I really wish he was around cuz I really do miss him but I do not think of him a lot, but today I looked through all this pictures of he and I and I realized how much I missed him and his caring stype. I don't want to date him again, he does have a girlfriend last time I talked to him, I would just enjoy being his friend. He is going away to college even though I am not going this year it would be nice to write to him. I have realized how my soul controlls my mouth and after Sean and I broke up, I wanted to mess up someone else, but in the end I messed up my self in a car accident which has pretty much ruined my school year and summer. The only thing I wish for is feeling like he could still trust me and I do see why he stopped talking to me, I dust wish I couldmake it up to him for being kind of crazy and only wanting my things like watching the spice world movie, my friend Bobby wants to see it but it does not come from inside me now. I never even listened to them, I like rock not pop. I guess he and I were on some sort of talking base so I could apologize to him and creat a friendship.