|Current mood:|| content|
|Current music:||"Forgot About Dre" by Dr. Dre and Eminem|
Weirdness...lots of weirdness...
So I just got done IM'ing with Ryan, of all people. I IM'ed him to congratulate him on his early gradutation.
With no bitterness attached, even. He IM'ed me back and we talked for an hour or so, about his new girl, Jenna, and about James, and our cars, and our lives. I shed a couple of tears after we signed off. I mean, it still kinda hurts, way deep down inside in that dark damp place that I don't like to let anyone see. It always will, you don't stay with someone for over a year and feel NOTHING ever again. Mostly I shed some tears because it's sad that Ryan and I had so many dreams and they all went horribly awry. That's a sad thing, when a couple dreams together then they break up and it all goes away. But I'm not upset now, I'm over it, I've got James (I think) and he's got Jenna, we're both happy and we don't hate each other anymore.
So I feel like I've closed a door that's been swinging in the breeze for a while. I've made peace with Ryan, and I feel better about our breakup now.
He read my journal and saw everything that I've been up to, and seemed quite amused.
And not bitter about James. I thought that he would be.
But oh, well.
James and I are seemingly doing well, taking shit slow. Got 4 DAMN GOOD goodnight kisses tonight. Talked to him on the phone for an hour after I got home. We're going out tomorrow night. I'm telling you, people, I really like this one, quite a bit.
I'm pretty tired, but I don't want to go to bed yet. My mom's got Blake at my grandma's due to the weather, so I'm up here all alone, but highly entertained all the same.
Anyway, I got in trouble for not giving a shout-out so...
This is a what's up to Eric, a former employee, who we miss at Chicken Hell, and is now another one of my readers.
And a what's up to Jay, another employee, who is another new reader.
Well, guys, I really ain't got much else to say. I feel like I've purged a lot of hate out of me tonight, talking to Ryan, and I'm happy about James, and if I can just get out of the hellhole that is my house life will be even better.
So goodnight, guys, I'm gonna go read like the geeky bookworm that I am!