|Current mood:|| sad|
Out in the open...but not.
I hate the smell of food. It is no longer a sense of comfort for me, it had been for a long time, but now its just a reminder. It reminds me of things that I hate and things that I once loved...but can't anymore. Its diffiult to explain and I don't want to, so I guess I won't.
Why do I bother writing in here anyway? Its the same with my livejournal and deviantArt journal, why do I bother if a) no one reads it, b) no one understands whats being said if they do read it, and c) I can write what I really mean in a real journal? ::sigh:: Maybe I'll figure it out someday... I want to stop writing in my online journals, but I kind of like the sense that maybe someone is reading them and understanding. Its not worth it though, no one gets it and if they do, its only trouble for both of us.
Maybe I'll just stop with my journals. Last time I tried that, I came back after...40 something days? Something like that.
Why? Probably 'cause I have nothing better to do. And it doesn't really help me, as much as we'd all like to think that.
...I hate this feeling of emptiness...