|Current mood:|| weird|
Blah. I'm confused. Really, out of all my friends, I'm the one with the most self-esteem. I don't really care what people think, I don't tag along with people, I really do love myself. But then again, there's that other side of me that feels...empty? It's like I've been running through life on a full tank of confidence, and then, now, all of a sudden, I'm stranded on the side of the road with an empty tank of NOTHING. I feel so un-Hanh-like. It's kinda sad. I feel sorry for myself. And I hate self-pity. I hate sympathy. Of all things I hate, that's number one: sympathy. Ugh.
I don't believe in love at first sight. I don't believe in the storybook, fairy-tale, happily-ever-after, Prince Charming love either. I don't believe in soul mates. I don't believe in any of those things. But I do believe in love. I put my faith in love. I used to think that I didn't need love. I didn't need anyone to care about me. But now I kind of realize that I do. I don't expect to fall in love anytime soon. But I've always held the hope that I'd find someone to look past my appearance and see what's really there. I'm a nice girl, really, I am. Refer to Sermon 3: Heartlessness in the Gospel Journal if you don't believe me...
Off to Great Adventure with Dee and Andrew later. Finally. Anything to get out of the house...