|Current mood:|| contemplative|
T.S. Bill and other assorted musings...
So I sign up for this "Live Journal" knock off site... or are they some how related?...on Saturday and spend like,4 hours typing madly about all kinds of shit. My past and present mostly. Things that are currently haunting my mind and things I consider to be issue's worth reflecting on. Wouldn't you know it, the first layers of Tropical Storm Bill invade my area and the power gets knocked out,loosing everything I had just written.
So I get up Sunday and do it all over agian... The T.S approaches,the power goes...this time T.S. Bill was here to stay for a while. Two days without power SUCKS!!!
Sitting in the dark with no creature comforts,will really let you know how much of a fucking geek you are. I was jonesing to get on the net and do all the oh so "UN-Important" crap that I do everyday!
Well,now that the power is on and I have put myself into media overload with the boob tube and the "puter",trying to get my pop culture/news fix,here's the top stuff on my mind;
Rap Videos/Rap Music in General
I remember when "Rap" music was the CNN of the streets. Even the "Gangsta's" were keeping it real and making music that impacted people in some degree. NWA and Ice T were like War Time Journalists to me.
As a White Boy who was heavily into Punk, for some reason that music grabbed me. I never felt the need to adopt the dress or slang from a culture I am obviously not a part of,but I did feel as if I could learn something and understand the world around me by tuning in.
Flash forward 10 years and Rap is a JOKE! Dont get me wrong, I am glad people are getting paid and all. But I think something more meaningful could come from the current crop of Hip Hop talent.
And the videos... the fucking videos! What genius invented the current Rap Video formula? Bling-Bling + 10 of your unemployed homies + 20 inch rims on your SUV + over used "hand jive'esque" movements + and plenty of big ghetto ass = a Rap Video. Fucking Run DMC invented the "Jive'esque" hand motions and nose wipes... can someone step up to the plate and help these mother fuckers evolve their formula?
Now dont get me wrong, I do like my Videos to have some Ass... Like "Beyonce" and Crazy in Love... girl if aint broke dont fix it! That woman is HOT!
Could someone decapitate that ass wipe? Hopefully he'll go the way of John Travolta and over expose him self to the public and just do a "Look Who's Talking" type move into obscurity.
Could anyone be more the epitome of an "Ass Wipe",than "W"? I have been plaqued by a variety of nervous disoders since that douchebag's Daddy helped rig the 2000 Election. Nov. 12th was certainly dooms day for this country and a small meter for what was to come.
Our Economy plumetted into the toilet days after he took office. Madmen attacked us on our own soil. And now we're in "Pre-Emptive War" mode. Bin Laden and Saddam are still MIA... theres no effective proof that either of them are in cahoots with each other and hundreds of thousands of American Soliders are stuck baking in the desert amidst a hostile environment.
Wheres all the fucking integrity that was suppossed to come to the White House? A man lies about some hoe trick,so he can salvage his already rocky marriage and the Repug's wanna lynch him. Yet the Bush Cabal can lie about the intentions and capabilities of a country that we have bombed and tortured for over 12 years,invent evidence,use coersion against our allies to tow the line and back us on a needless war and he gets off scott free?
I havent even touched on the Enron debacle,Funeralgate or Cheney's business dealings... ::: Why are Americans
so fucking stupid and gulliable?::: Too many Sheeple!
:::CLASS WAR...JUST DO IT!:::
The Santeria Front
I havent been able to get in contact with Padrino for MONTHS! I had assumed the worst and thought he was avoiding me for some reason. It isnt like I don't give him reason to. I mean, I am one dysfunctional mother fucker. And my life is pretty chaotic... yet I know its all my fault. I blame no one but myself. I have Ori Buruku...
a bad head and make poor choices and decisions. Ocha is suppossed to help ease this to some degree,or so I have heard.
The Orisha have been telling me to get crowned since I was thirteen,now I am thirty-something. At the current moment in my life,scrounging together a few bucks to rent DVD's is a hassle... saving for Ocha is impossible!
Anyhow, I was going through some really testy personal problems... totally devastating events and was trying to reach out for help and make sense of it all somehow. So I opt to do the obvious,get a dilogun reading. After months of phone tag to no avail, I start emailing my Padrino and get no reply. Eshu must have heard my prayers and accepted my road side offering of left overs,because I finally connected with him. I tell him whats going on at the moment and he deems an emergency reading over the phone appropriate due to our distance from each other.
He tells me he'll call me back after he checks his schedule and we'll set up a time. Two months pass by,with no word from him and more "phone stalking" from me,again to no avail. I start to really freak out. My problems werent getting any better and here the man I entrust my spiritual well being to,seems to be avoiding me.
Then I really start to make mountains out of mole hills... and conccoct all kinds of crazy BS in my head as to why.
Again,randomly he and I connect again... same vanishing act from him in the end. And for some odd reason, I run across my Ojubona's LJ site and read him venting about my Padrino. He was only venting, healthy stuff I guess... but I email him to ask about my Padrino's condition like 5 days ago and he has yet to respond.
Your Ojubona is the go to guy/gal when your Godparent is unavailable... I follow protocol,concerned and really needing some sort of guidence... and get nothing for a week... Is this is a test from Legba,if so I am failing miserably.
I dont proclaim to have love for too many people that I have met in my life. I cant even say that about my birth parents... we have some serious unresolved issues that arent going to get resolved as far as I can see...but I do have an immense love,admiration and total respect for my Padrino,a man I dont know as well I want to and definitely dont/havent spent as much time with as I would like to.
I remember with intense clarity the moment he touched my head during the Bead Ceremony. There was all kinds of stuff going on in the room that could be termed as a major distraction... but when he laid his hands on me and began to pray... I have never felt more complete and balanced as I did at that moment. I had a high that lasted at least a week after words. Very intense and very beautiful.
Being around him and my Godfamily is very fulfilling too, on so many levels.
Now putting together some peices of the puzzle, I find he has some issues of his own to deal with. I feel awful for
thinking some of the things I was thinking a while back. It's so easy to forget our Godparents are people too.
With the same frailties,weaknesses and problems we all encounter within ourselves.
Baba A, if for some quirky reason you ever run across this, know that you have my love and upmost respect as a person,friend and priest. I thank Yemoja everyday for leading me to you. If I can every give back to you, just an iota of what you give to so many people, I'll know I have accomplished something on earth.