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All the things I wanted to say...but couldn't. (drownxinxdreams) wrote,
@ 2003-05-29 14:15:00
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    Stay still
    Don't breathe
    I want to soak up this memory
    Before it has all washed away

    My bed was empty last night.
    I slept all alone
    The sleeping part was ok
    It seems easier to get up in the morning
    When I haven't crawled home from a late night
    Even still I missed the bus because I was lost deep in thought
    You seem to be all I think about anymore
    So it's been about 24 hours
    And I'm starting to feel the cramp of nervousness in my stomach
    that "I miss you" feeling

    I want you to come over now
    to kidnapp me from where ever I am at the moment and take me away
    "He played the hero this morning" I'd say
    "Saving me from the everyday world and taking me to our fantasy."
    I think he sensed an over reaction
    He sensed the worry I had for fear he'd forget everything we had shared
    "I'll send you something while you are sleeping...and in the morning you can tell me your dreams."
    I wish my dreams would come true.
    Talking about them only teases me for what I cannot have.

    He said my eyes tell stories...
    And he said that he could tell I wasn't happy with the outcome
    He could read it in me
    Just like he does everytime
    That it wouldn't be so tempting if I was really happy
    He said he saw it in my eyes as soon as he had picked me up from school
    He knew
    And he didn't want me to hurt like that
    To cry, he said, kills him inside
    He said I deserved better
    I knew knew it got any better than this...
    And why do I just let him walk away?
    He put into words my worst fears and now they are eating me away..
    ..like acid
    And why does it hurt?
    Why am I so scared and sad?
    I know I didn't help the situation
    because instead of being strong,
    I let him know that what he was doing really hurts.
    that it effected me, and that I really do love him...

    Ja ta dore... or how ever you spell it....


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