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Warning: This is gonna be quite the sentimental blog entry. For those of you who know me, it comes as no surprise that most of my friends are younger than me, and that 3 groups of friends that I have are comprised of people younger, if not much younger, than me. Which explains what I had mentioned as the "kuya mode" in the last entry. At some point, I don't see these people as just my friends. I see them as my brothers. For instance, Rio (Punkrally), though my cousin (nope, not regretfully, Hahaha!) along with Rex from the Barqs. I share a great deal of affinity with these two not just because of common interests, but because we've all seen each other through thick and thin. These are people (just like the rest of the squad and the Barqs) as the brothers I never had. Rex even declared me as something which, til this very day, touches me deeply as it shows how much I've been an influence to someone: The big brother he never had. But with all the brothers I've never had in my life, one of which is someone I will be sharing about right now. I've known Matt for a good 6 years now. Back then (I was around 18 and he had just turned 15 I think), he was this stringbean of a little boy in his teens, with a bald head, baggy clothes and a slight unibrow which Rio loves making fun of. This guy was the true essence of innocence. He barely touched a smoke or a bottle of beer in his life. Imagine my total and utter amusement when I'd see little Matt order iced tea or apple juice, and even shun hard drinks with Phallic names (see Blowjob). Matt was, for a time, my bandmate. We formed the LYF Project with current GK Advocate Greg and OBS front man Carlos (of course, with the occasional cameos by Niño of OBS, Armi of Up Dharma Down and her fave drummer Ean). He was there in full support in the group, and is featured in my thesis' video "1:37 Remix" (which, coincidentally, was our collaboration). I still have the stills, the pics, the draft CD and the full-length videos of him (yes, people found him adorable when he was in the first scene asleep, waking up suddenly to look at the time on his cellphone). I was there when he shared at a Youth Camp about his attempt to run away when his family was still based in Jakarta. And with stories like that, I also got to hear about his girl problems. I was there to hear, sing and perform a song he wrote for this girl he was all googly-eyed about ("Just Be Cool"), and even went on to help him compose a song for another girl ("Miracles/Paul's Song"). In the same video mentioned above, I directed and filmed Matt writing some girl's name on the beach sand as he watch that cold, cold wave drag the name away. And yes, I was there through each googly moment for one girl who he eventually got together with. I remember being one of the first few who got his uber-giddy text at 10am on a Sunday. Then there was thing long period of time where, right before my own eyes, he started changing (ironic that I use this line, seeing as one of my blog sites is entitled so). His circle of friends kept growing, and he had gone on to try things such as smoking and drinking. By this time, he was very much pushing for his band to gain notoriety. And that was something he always enjoyed sharing to people. What did I mean by his band? LYF Project's members moved on to pursue different things musically (thus spawned his group Ephesus). I could go on with that bit, but to sum it up, I felt that Matt and I were growing apart. He started to growing up, hanging out with his longtime friends as well as friends he had when he got to college. This, of course, was human nature. We're all bound to grow apart from other people we're friends with. This was something I could truly understand, as I went through that, too. Which was probably why I couldn't be mad at him. Sure, my "little brother" was growing up, but it didn't stop me from being the brother that I am to him. And by that I meant calling to check up with him. Imagine my surprise hearing something like "Dude, I fell down a flight of stairs" and seeing my shock turn into amusement. And that's something I was proud of.. That I was in touch with him regardless of how the world passed. Recently (wait.. last night, rather), I took time out from my busy schedule to check up on him. We decided to hang out last night with a friend of his. Arriving at his house at 9pm, I was a bit shocked. I didn't see a stringbean of a little boy in his teens, with a bald head and baggy clothes. Not even someone with hair sprouting out of his head, in his emo outfit. This was a slightly different Matt, and I was praying that he wasn't a stranger anymore. Matt is now a bushy-haired emo boy, with eyebugs bigger than mine. He didn't move like a young teenager either. There I was watching my "little brother" pour his heart out in his current dilemma. And believe me, my heart went out to him, as if we hadn't been gone from each other's lives for a long time. I was there listening to every cuss and every sob that came out of him. All the while I didn't wish to hear him sound different or act violently. And then I saw it, and realized it even more. Matt didn't change completely. He was still the wacky person he is, except that he grew up, and never lost his morals for being a better person. He wanted to be and do the right thing in life. The night may have comprised of an hour and a half of him spilling his guts(and about 25 minutes laughing at crazy stories over Red Horse), but 5 minutes worth of my 2 cents further stengthened something that I had declared him as for the entire history that I've known him. "Matt Warren, you will always be the little brother I've never had. No matter what happens, whether the proverbial shit hits the fan, no matter if the eternal sunshine drains your very soul, be rest assured that I will always have your back no matter what." Advanced Happy 21st birthday, bro. Let's fucking set the world ablaze and live life. God bless you, see you next month at the beach. :)
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