|Current mood:|| contemplative|
|Current music:||beck - motherfucker|
sex creates confusion pt. 1
well, to start this story off it requires a little bit of a back story. a few months ago i was at my friend's place. i'd just bought a couple videogames and they all decided that we were drinking tonight and wanted me to stay. i agreed. i mean, free beer, who can pass that up? we played a game of Euchre and then everyone decided to play some poker. me being broke and not liking to gamble anyway played some videogames.
fast forward about 4 hours. everyone that was drinking pretty much left. except 4 of us. the 2 that actually lived there, Neil and Michelle respectively, decided they were going to bed and another was going to sleep on the love seat, since i refused to give up my couch for anything. me, being very inebriated and bored, decided to lie on the bed with my 2 friends nothing strange here. i've done this a million times before. eventually. we ended up all sleeping together. my first 3 some. this isn't the part that worries me. the only thing that worried me is that in the future when they get into a fight this could, possibly, come back to haunt me.
this continued for another couple weeks almost every night, and it still happens from time to time.
anyway, i'm getting ahead of myself, Michelle, then, got into this habit of touching me all the time while we watching a movie, or i was helping her cook, or whatever. again, this didn't bother me, but felt kind of awkward since her and neil are seeing eachother. i knew if he found out it could possibly bother him. i'm pretty sure the touching wouldn't bother him, hell other girls touch him and michelle doesn't really care. so, it would work both ways, right? anyway, i convinced myself that was alright as long as it didn't go beyond that.
same as the sex, this comes and goes and usually doesn't get too heated. it just ends up with her teasing me and noticing me being aroused and stops like the bitch she is.
alright, so, thursday night i tell them that i may spend the weekend at dad's since i've not seen him in a while and he wanted to see me. later that night as i'm walking out of the bedroom Michelle stops me and sort of pins against the wall and says, "yer leaving us tomorrow?" i said, "yeah." jokingly she replies, "nope. not allowed." and kisses me. then she says, "besides, if you stay here we can have some fun tomorrow night," and grabs my dick. so, knowing that she doesn't really request sex, which she's pretty much doing, very often and the fact that it's been awhile i decide to stay.
the next day, i tell them that sunday night i'm staying at dad's to see him and so i can record The Dead Zone. they jokingly say, "you can't leave us." and then we all laugh. i told neil to pick me up sunday night and all will be cool. no fuss was raised.
then, this morning, neil was out doing something for the neighbor and michelle + i were watching a movie. she looks over and asks when i'm leaving. i tell her around nine o'clock. and the procede to tell her that dad wanted me to stay over the weekend. she then says, "why didn't you?" wtf? she practically begged me to stay. i just kind of shrugged my shoulders, i didn't feel like explaining myself. why feed her ego?
later, after we eat and things, neil fell asleep in the chair and michelle was lying on the couch next to me. she ended up resting her head on my lap. no big deal, we've watched tv like this for years and no one really bothers to think anything. she asks, "am i bothering you?" i said, "no." it didn't really bother me, and i knew she wasn't feeling the greatest. the she starts rubbing my arm and leg. so, i was thinking, this girl is trying to coax me into staying.
after the movie we all venture down to the hallway and chill. i ended up standing just a few steps above her and jokingly say, "while yer down there." and she laughed. then she did her cute little voice and said, "i can't believe your leaving." and stuck out her tongue seductively. i said, "i'll be back tomorrow, girl." she then replied, "yer gonna make me wait that long?" "it's only a day." and she then frowned.
finally, nine o'clock rolls around and i run upstairs to put my shoes and belt on and grab a pack of smokes. as i was walking out i patted her on the head and said, "see you tomorrow, girl." and she said, "whatever." i didn't really look to see if she was joking or not.
in conclusion, i'm not really quite sure what to make of it. either she wanted to get laid tonight and that was her way of luring me in, or she's attached to me and has to have my company, or she's fallin in love with me and can't stand having me away from her.