| Current mood: |  apathetic |
| Current music: | um....non...just little sisters arguing |
Um...stuff...........
la la la la la! I am so HAPPY! Yeah, right, I'm walking aroung kicking myself in the pants (as usual) for all the stupid things I've said and done. Not to mention what I've lost because of myself. Sitting here screaming "I MISS
YOU! inside my brain, thinking about you all the time, and how bad I want it, but the fact that I probably don't deserve it and that you probably have forgotten about me. Everything I do, everywhere I go, I see you, feel, you, god, I even remember what you smell like. The goats, the fence, the bench, the moon, my room, everything, I miss it, want it, I'd die for it, but I know that (almost definitely, I can't have it). I blew my one chance *kicks self*GAH! I feel so out of balance, so, tilted. whoa, not to mention dizzy, I've felt dizzy ever since I got home. I'm still wondering how I got blood on my pajama pants last night, the FRONT of my pants, (too much info, yea?) But of well, I'm venting. I mean, what the heck kind of a position was I sleeping in!? Gah, bled through my pants today, for the first time ever. Stupid annoyances, mabey it would be better to be a guy.......or not, I dunno. I wish some things never happened, oh well, everything happens for a reason. Life is like a house of cards, it can take years to build, but in one moment, the whole thing collapses. *sigh*
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