| Current mood: |  distressed |
Happy birthday, I'm forever your's.
Today was so stupid. I got up (an action I wish I never partook in) and watched a freaking Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen movie because it was the only thing on. Luckily, I saw that Dogma was playing and I watched that instead. Comedy Central is my savior.
I went to Toys R Us with my mother tonight in search of something for Dave, but we had no luck. So we decided to do what only ignoramuses do. Yes, we decided to go to the mall on BLACK FRIDAY. One of the worst possible decisions that one could make. God, I hate the mall enough as it is, but the mall on Black Friday, the biggest shopping day of the year? That's fucking unbearable. I was practically suffocating from all of the dirty, smelly pieces of shit wandering aimlessly just taking up space. Why go to the mall if you don't plan on buying anything? I swear the mall just pays these people to stand around and get in your way. They deserve to be shot and killed. I can't stand people.
Thanksgiving was pretty gay. I ate with my father and brother and the whole time my brother kept holding up his fork in a threatening manner, telling me how he was going to stab me in the face. God, I fucking hate him. He's almost 18 and he still hits and teases his little sister when he doesn't get his way. He needs to be shot and killed to, and I'll be glad to do so.
Ah, I have come to the revelation that one of the worst feelings that one can have is knowing that things are out of your control, and there is nothing you can do to prevent it. In the Matrix, Neo says that he doesn't believe in fate because he doesn't like the thought of him not being in control of his life, but really, when are you ever really in control of your life? There are so many people and things that factor into it that make it impossible for you to get what you want without a ton of things/people getting in your way. But it's horrible, especially if you really believe that you are in control of your life. It's horrible just watching everything unfold in front of you, knowing that there is nothing you can do about it. And it's horrible when these people who are making this happen to you are totally oblivious to it and just keep acting like the pompous assholes they are. I swear, all -- if any -- empathy that people ever had is now totally drained out of them. People are just so selfish, and it pisses me off. I'm not making myself out to be any saint, because I am plenty selfish but people are just so freaking OBLIVIOUS and that's what makes them so selfish. But then again, I think that even if people weren't oblivious to things that they would still be selfish, because people only care about themselves anymore. It's just such a hopeless feeling when everything is just out of your control, and all you can do is stand by and watch, and no matter what you do or say, it will still have no impact on the outcome of things. People need to be shot and killed. Lots, and lots of people.
I conclude.
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