| Current mood: |  anxious |
| Current music: | Jean Louisa Kelly - Someone To Watch Over Me |
I hate studying...
I really do.
Right now it's pissing me off because I don't want to, and yet my mind is screaming at me, "STUDY! STUDY, you worthless lout!! Do you want to flunk your damn exams?! Perhaps the biggest exams of your life?!"
I know. I should be hittting the books. But dear gawd, the books suck so much.
If the Rapture were to come now and take everyone away, it'd be such sweet bliss because then exams and studying would take a backseat. Yes, I know it's a selfish and stupid reason to want the Rapture, but I do so hate studying.
But I want to pass even more. I need at least 2 D's to get into this university (I know... kinda low standard huh?) but I so wanna get B's and stuff. I doubt I can manage A's...
I'm kinda worried about my exams, but at the same time, a part of me is thinking, "Damn, I'm a smart person! I don't need to be stressed out! All I have to do is plan my study schedule and everything will be fine. I just have to pray, have faith, and discipline myself!"
Prayer and faith are fine. It's the discipline that's hard. I just can't bring myself to sit there and read and read and read over and over again. Which is why I sometimes end up studying a few days before the exam when the panic forces me to.
I think this all stems from over-confidence and the fact that I could study a little bit and do fine. Nowadays, the subjects demand more reading and comprehension, and my mindset is just not geared to it.
I just wanna shout and rally up some educational anarchy...
(Read comments)
|
