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Alexis Raccene Spencer (cdaisy) wrote,
@ 2003-09-04 21:56:00
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    Current mood: uncomfortable

    Bothered

    Suddenly, I feel detached. Is it my tendancy to be quiet in loud areas, or is there something else? I'm in a new house, in a new school, everything is new. And i feel so alone. Even thought my best friend is here on campus with me. Even though she is only across campus at her own house. And even though i don't necessarily want her to be here. Yet i feel, removed. Unapart. And i wonder to myself? Why is it that Bonnie, a house mate of mine, just as new, just as detached by default, why is it that she knows where everyone lives, where everyone spends their time? Why does she get so much attention right off the bat? i understand why katlyn does. She's easy, she's also a returning student. She knows the ins and outs of this place, she knows a lot of people that live here. I don't question her sucess. What's wrong with me? Am I ugly? Is there something wrong with me? Something that makes me lesser of a person? I am outgoing, I am friendly, but somehow, its not the same. I am seperate from them.

    I feel so alone. So very alone. And i don't really know why.



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