| Current mood: | bipolar |
| Current music: | Chopin |
Today
...would be a good day to die. No one would miss me. Definitely not my parents. They never did miss me. Daniel just announced that he is moving out and thanks a lot, but he did not need my help. And Derek... According to him I am fat, ugly and old... He doesn't want to see me again... ever again. This is just all messed up, he wanted to see me, so I went there this morning... Went to see him... And I shall never forget the disgust on his face when he saw me...
No, I am NOT suicidal, but I am sad. I am not giving up hope yet. I so love him, and I believe that maybe... somehow.... he will like me at least a little bit. If he won't... Well, then he will love someone else and he will be happy. But I want to believe he will love me.
I am not going to get drunk, that would not make anything better. But I will go and find a gym and work out, so I won't be that fat. And I am going to stay away from him for a few days and play tourist in London, live up my last paycheck and... enjoy life.
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