|Current mood:|| numb|
well, here it is going on 1pm, paul has to be at work at 3pm and i haven't heard from him or talked to him since monday. inside is hurting so bad but i'm going to keep smiling and try not to let it get me down too much. god, i miss him. i know we're not even broken up or anything but sheesh, i miss lying in his bed waiting patiently for him to come there and hold me. hold me with his warm body against mine. our warmth together is one of the greatest feelings i've ever felt. i feel like my body melts within his and we're one. although, i know he doesn't feel the same. he wants his space, that's fine... i know he needs to find himself but why can't he see how much i love, care and respect him? why can't he understand that my love is so deep for him that it brings tears to my eyes and make my stomach feel hollow and my heart? oh how my heart feels so empty.
i have to gasp for air when i think about his touch, his voice, his breath.