| Current mood: |  cranky |
| Current music: | the crossroads..."and im gonna miss everybody" |
shame
so i suppose i can admit that i miss judged someone. i suppose. i mean, there were no attempted conversions when albert went to dinner last night, but...maybe hes just biding his time. i don't trust those sneaky relgious folk...yes sneaky, pridefull, arrogant, in direct contrast to what their religion teaches. hmmm....
speaking of albert at dinner, he didn't come home til like 1 am and it made me worry because he didn't call. maybe i seem like a psycho but he said at like ten thirty that he would be home in a "LITTLE BIT" what kind of a little bit is 2 and a half hours? yeah... well, he could have at least called if he was going to watch that movie. All ic an think about is that hes in a car accident or something and i sit and stress out. loook, im sorry i have anxiety attacks and that my crazy brain jumps to the worst possible conclusion but it does.... so if he is going to be with me he just has to take into consideration my seemingly uncurable moments of freak out and just freakin call when he is going to be late.
Anyway, i got to leave work early which was pretty damn cool. it made the whole day good. better. yaay no work. i went grociery shopping with jacob. man, don't deny that man his juice and alfredo...it isn't pretty. Heh 4:52 was cookie time. there is nothing quite like having a roommate who shares your adoration for cookies. Then we went to celebration. its so pretty there. but i don't know about his friends girlfriend. she was smart and everything but sometimes people can say the stupidest shit. she said something about how michael jackson, how it shouldn't matter if he molested those children because hes done so much good in the world or something. was she serious? i don't know. I really don't think she understands. What the hell? It's okay to molest children if you're a good person who does good things? I don't think so. I don't care if its mother theresa or ghandi or.... who cares, you molest children and you should just be shot in the damn head. God i wanted to screamat her. but i generally try not to scream at people i don't know that well. i don't know, maybe those are the people you should scream at...heh... anyway, it's just.... you can't make that kind of a statement if you've ever known the shame... such shame... and it doesn't go away it doesn't leave it's jsut there constantly...this feeling of shame. and micheal jackson did that (allegedly as we do have a "justice" system) to those kids, if he made them feel that shame.... fuck him. he could cure fuckin cancer, i don't care, you molest a kid you should be shot.... in the dick... well, first we'd have to get the cure for cancer from him...then shoot him. that should just BE the law in the US Molest a kid = death by shot in the dick or shot until dead i guess if you were a woman you'd be shot....in the ... tit? i don't know, somehwere.... shot until dead.... rape a person, shot until dead.... just bam dead... but make it slow...
God im blood thirsty huh...
and what a bitch for making me dwell on past issues. i know she didn't know but still... god who does know. like three or four people.... and we all do our best to pretend i never said anything...pretend it never happened. And thats whats been happening all my life. it works for me... it didn't happenitididn'thappen...it didn't...didn't happen...
craP... time to talk about other things...
so we came home from celebration and then i sat and bugged jacob while he played poker, at least he was too nice to say "go away, im playing poker!" and i was to selfish to go away on my own. and he says he's a mean person.... well... he let me bug him so..
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