Adrian (blue_bubbles7) wrote, @ 2006-01-01 08:14:00

New Years and Tears
Happy New Year!

So i went to watch the sunrise this morning and all of a sudden i started crying. I dont know why. Maybe it was because of the quiet morning sitting at a softball diamond watching the blackness slowly turn to lighter shades and into purples, pinks and oranges. As i sat there for an hour watching the sun fully rise i thought of all the things that have happened this past year. I cried even more (still dont know why). i tried to remember the last time i cried and i couldnt so when i got home (dads house) i looked up on my lovely blurty here and went through my enties because when major things happened i run to my trusty loving, listening, never judging journal. So the last time i cried was the begining of last year after my sisters death.

I thought to myself... could i have really only cried then? Out of a full year...that was the last time i cried. As i look at the other two years of my wonderful haven of a journals existence i had cried many a time...over lost friends and stupid high school fights, and a lot had been from James and my fights.

So flash back to the sunrise/crying this morning...as i thought about why i might be crying i suddenly thought...what does it matter? It isnt a bad cry...i feel good. so i said to myself what the hell....and cried even more and felt even better.

If i am lucky and have another totally blissful year again maybe this will be the only time i cried this year.....

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