| Current mood: |  confused |
| Current music: | Syd Barrett: "Baby Lemonade" |
The smiling portrait of you, is still hanging on my frowning wall
So far this week has been lacking in the "interesting events" department. I didn't go to school on Monday or Tuesday because I just didn't feel like it. ... and when I went back today .. I dont know why .. but it felt weird. For about a week now, I've felt this way .. I dont know exactly how to describe it, but this morning .. everything pissed me off. I think its fear. I'll openly admit it .. I'm scared. I'm fucking scared of this whole situation right now. I feel like I'm jumping out of a plane without a parachute .. and I dont know where to go from here. Do I just stop where I am? or do I keep going .. trying to make more of an effort to bring me and Elisha together? I know I looked like complete crap today .. but he still sat there and stared at me, and that really makes me think .. it makes me wonder... I still cant believe he just showed up at my house on Friday .. maybe that means something? I wasnt even expecting him .. Bryan also told me today in math that Elisha told him about being over at my house Friday .. does that mean anything at all? Yeah, we've established the fact that he talks about me to Bryan .. and possibly others .. who the fuck knows .. So many things pop into my head too .. its all just way too insane, and takes way to much thought. I wish there was a simple solution for this.
In another situation ... Little TJ was supposed to come get me later today .. and I dont know if he's still going to or not .. because I told him my dad was coming to get me and my brother. This sucks because I really wanted to go with (Little) TJ over to (Big) TJ's house .. automatically you know I'm gonna get some really good weed. Big TJ always has good shit. ... I need money .. blegh. I hate this situation. So hopefully we'll go over to his house tomorrow .. I hope. ;/
The rooms were so much colder then.
My father was a soldier then.
And times were very hard.
When I was young.
When I was young.
I smoked my first cigarette at ten.
And for girls, I had a bad yen.
And I had quite a ball,
When I was young.
When I was young it was more important.
Pain more painful, the laughter much louder, yeah.
When I was young.
When I was young.
I met my first love at thirteen.
She was brown, and I was pretty green.
And I learned quite a lot.
When I was young.
When I was young.
When I was young it was more important.
Pain more painful, laughter much louder, yeah.
When I was young.
When I was young.
My faith was so much stronger then.
I believed in fellow men.
And I was so much older then.
When I was young.
When I was young.
When I was young.
When I was young.
When I was young.
-|[Nicole]|-
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