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Shakti (blindragon) wrote,
@ 2004-01-08 08:22:00
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    Current music:3 doors down - here without you

    all the miles that seperate
    disappear now, when I'm dreaming of your face

    it's strange... how much I love you, and ache for you, when you're not around
    but when you are, I won't talk to you, I barely acknowledge you

    i heard this life is overrated
    but I hope that it gets better as we go

    Jarrod Adam White got ahold of me. He was in my life for a few short days. I miss what I thought we had. The closeness I imagined was there. The love I imagined I felt in his arms, in his eyes. The way I'd watch him sleep, and feel an overwhelming sense of love and passion. how we'd make love, everywhere and anywhere... any time. How he'd move my hair from my face, and tell me how beautiful I am. And his rough masculine hands would caress my cheek ... and he'd tell me how much he loved me.

    I miss how jealous he'd act... how demanding he was...

    Jason Edward Vaughn, I love you. And I hurt because of it. Because what I want, and what I need... you won't give me. When you walked behind me, several times this morning, and said goodbye before you left... I wanted to stand up and wrap my arms around your neck. I wanted to kiss you, then bury my head into your neck, and feel your arms wrap around me, holding tightly on to me. But I remained seated, chatting with my mental infactuation. Letting him make any form of emotion disappear from my life, leaving a mental satisfaction there.

    Jason, I love you.

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