| Current mood: | dazed |
| Current music: | B101 (what else is new...?) |
"I have your watch." "...I have you."
I know I should be asleep. I know I am fucking exhausted. But things keep running over and over in my head. I laid down to try and sleep, and that failed horribly. So I'm back here, in front of this curse-ed machine, trying to get things out of my head so I can actually sleep. They don't even have to be gone from my head. They can just be less stressful...Is that too much to ask? Yes. Probably. Maybe. There's so much I have to do, and it feels like I have zero zippo nada no time to complete it in. Such crap. I am dreading May 5th. History Project due. AP English Exam...which I haven't paid for...?!?!?!?!?!?! National Honors Society sh'bang. On the SAME DAY. What kind of sick joke is that? If I am alive after May 5th, I know that if the end of the world comes about, it will be cockroaches, Cher, and myself. That's how grueling these next few weeks are going to be. And so, you mean people, you see that you should stop being mean to me and focus on getting all of YOUR work done. I think my life is full enough without antics/ drama/ emotional crap. Yes. I said it. Emotional crap. Blah. Have I mentioned lately how great I think Jeffy is? I don't think I have, and I really should. He really is something special. I met his mother tonight; she came to the Spring Concert. She told me I was pretty. I felt a little awkward. But it was so nice of her. And another person told me today that I was "just as pretty on the inside as you are on the outside." I thought that was really nice too. I was flattered in the extreme. Both times. Jeffy was also the 1000th hit on this journal. Neato. Good times. I'm very happy about the amount of hits this is getting. It's cool that people are interested in what I have to say. I don't usually have anything deep to say, but apparently other people think differently. I appreciate that. So thank you. Thank you for being a supporter of the Becka Journal. I still can't believe I have kept this thing for over a year. That's so crazy. I have never been so dedicated to a journal. I think in all my years of aimless journal/ diary writing, I have only finished 5 or 6 journals, from start to finish. That's really not a lot. At all. I have probably about 7 journals started, all started within the past year/ year and a half. That's just sad. But, even though I can't use names sometimes, and can't be completely honest here, I like the idea that at least someone else is reading my words. My thoughts. You judge me on what I write here. You can decide if I'm worth the effort a friendship. You can call me on being bitchy or unfair. You can comment on how much you (don't) love me, to just say hello, or to add your two cents on whatever the subject of the day is. Thank you again. I always love feedback. Your thoughts. I love when people leave me comments. I love them in general, but I love the ones with a higher purpose. I think I should try and sleep again...The screen is getting a little out of focus. Weee. G'night, nice people.
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