| Current mood: | worried |
| Current music: | "The Rat Who Would Be King"-MGB, Audio of Being |
Alright, I admit it. I'm a moron who's being neglecting you all.
I know, I know, it can't be forgiven, but Gaia's just so addictive! I can't control myself. Everytime I sign on, I HAVE to go to that site. It's like they've brainwashed me and told me, "You woman. You anime fan. You like cute. You need play on cute site." or something obscene like that. It's just...weird, ya know? *shrugs*
Anyway, I'll probably be updating more since nothing really happens anymore, I suppose. Yes, that actually means *gasp* I will be off Gaia for a while.
Well, not this weekend. I'll scarcely be online this weekend do to the lovely project that my English teacher decided to give us and with in such a little time to do it. It's due May 1st and I know damn well that I cannot find 5 poems and write 50-75 words on them. That's what we call "murder by schoolwork", little kiddies. If she dare gives us homework other than that, well, let's just say I'll file myself a complaint.
Hm, I DO need to send Mrs. Weatherford my short story, do I not? Oops.
I didn't do my maths homework. I'll just tell Mrs. Cobb what happened today so I might be able to get off the hook.
And what happened today, Kalie?
Oh, nothing, just I scraped my knee so badly while playing kickball that I can't bend it or it hurts VERY VERY badly and...two of the kittens are missing.
Yes, that's right, kittens. The little orange kitty, Fingerbiter, had 5 kittens 4 days ago. She had 2 orange kittens and 3 black. One of the blacks kittens died and...one of the orange kittens has disappeared.
You don't know how it feels to lose a kitten when you've seen all the other kittens the cats lived. I've lost plently of cats before, but when I think of a kitten dying...it's like the poor thing never even had a chance to be out in the big world. Maybe it wasn't ready, yet , but I...I wish it hadn't died. I wish it had lived and moved on like the other kittens. Now I'm just afraid the other kittens will die as well. They looked healthy. They looked surprisingly healthy by being born from a mother whose only 6 months old. Maybe that was the key thing that killed that kitten. Dammit, I will not let them all go down. I've waited too long for kittens and again and I won't wait anymore. I'm determined to keep those little ones alive. I will see that the remaining 3 make it through or goddammit, I won't.
You think it's funny? You think it's something not worth crying over for? I've got two words to say to you. "Fuck you" Grow up and get a heart. A dead kitten is like an human whose lost their life. Yeah, and you know how much intelligent people we need around here. Cats are intelligent. Don't you dare say that they are not, because maybe you haven't lived with cats your whole life like I have. I think I'd know them better than you would.
And you know what else I'm worried about? Joseph. He hasn't been all day. Yeah, you're thinking, "Oh man, Kalie, that's pathetic." No, don't lie. I know you're thinking that deep down. And you know what? I don't care if it's pathetic. So, I get worried when he's not online. So I get worried when he says things that imply him being hurt in some fashion. So I'm protective of him. So, I need protection too. So, I'm fragile as well. I don't care. I'd give up my life for him.
And don't say, "But you don't live in the same state. It won't work out." because you know what? It will work out because our little cottage is about 40 miles away from him. That's right, I could drive to his house if I wanted to. I could see him. I could touch his face. I could hug and hold him tightly. I could kiss him. But I wouldn't without his permission. I love him and that's the end of that. Not Engel, not Iwa-chan, not Ryuu, not Sam, not Kyle or Noodlez, but him and probably only him for a while.
And now, as I get out of my bad mood, I wanna say...I love all of you guys. You're all like my family on here. I help you with your problems, you help me in return. Okay, so we're closer than your average typical American/Canadian family, right? *sends a basket of red glitter to each one of her friends and also sends many glomps and kisses their way*
I'm out. Ciao!
-Kalie
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