It's late and I want to talk...dont read
I hear my grandfather and parents talking in the backround. Boy am I glad not to be there. Sometimes conversation can be the most terrible torture in the world. especially when one of you feels like silence is the best teacher.
I did it again. No... not "it" like those moronic perverts say... First of all, let me say that I dont cut. That's stupid. You get scars and can seriously hurt yourself. But I like pain sometimes. Just enough. A pin works. That's it. I just prick myself with a small pin and I'll be fine. But the thing that bothers me is that I get such a rush out of the whole thing. Part of who I am to other people is that i'm a together-nice-gil. What shit. I know that there has to be something wrong with me because that role doesnt fit as nicely. But this whole pin thing is just stupid. What the heck am i thinking? But it's kind of like accupuncture for me. That's what I keep saying. And in a way it's true. I would never do something terrible to myself. But i still want to get what I can...
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