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Shelli (allfuckedup666) wrote,
@ 2004-03-27 22:25:00
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    Current mood: numb
    Current music:Mona Lisa Smile

    Gotta let it burn.
    Blah I feel like shit although I know I shouldnt. While he sit's at home and has his "fun". I mean come on. Well any way this is how my weekend went.....

    Friday: Went to the YMCA after my mom was all bitchin n shit n I couldnt take the house n e more. And then I came home and Ray hadnt called me all day nor the day b 4. So I was all pissed and crying. So I get online and who is on? Everyone but I didnt feel like talking to them. Then My Christina Pooh has her away message on so when my mom gets sick and tired of hearing cry she tells me to take my meds. and go to bed. So I tell Jessi bye and tell him to call me and I leave My Pooh bear a message to call me asap. She calls like 2 min. later and I spill my little heart out to her. Then she has to get off the phone. So then I go down stairs and sleep with my 2 little sisters.

    Saturday: I woke up at like 9-30 thinking yea I better get up early in case Ray Ray calls and my mom dosent wake me up. So then 10-30 comes around so my mom is like hey want to got to curves? So I was like yea and I took my phone with me in case he call's me. So I go there and I get weighed and what not and I found out that I lost 7 pounds. I am so pround of mi self and then I also lost 3 inches in my waist! Then we came home and we got ready to leave and go swimming and what not. Called my Pooh bear and she was stil sleeping. Then she came to the YMCA and we went swimming and worked out and went into the sauna and what not. We kept getting in trouble by this bitchy ass life guard who walked like she had a stick up her flat ass. lol. But yea. Then she left and my dad came and picked up my little sister. Now I am babysitting till my parents get back from the bar. Erk I am so bored.

    Well 2morrow will be the same old shit. Sittin around and doing nothing. Talking on line and what not. Waitin for ray to call. I mean he tell's me I'm not allowed out and I dont relli go out. I dont with my friends. expect for christina which was only 2day. So blah. I dont know. I hate this. Why am I waiting? I mean I know why, I love him. But the question is does he love me? I dont know n e more. I just wish I could go back in time way back and then I would never have moved to Delaware! That way I would have never been such a screw up nor would I have hurt so many ppl. Blah Blah. I am so bored and tired. Well I have to go b cuz my pooh bear is making me hurry so if there is n e missed spelling it's her fault. I love Ray Ray and I love you Pooh Bear!!

    Some people live for the fortune
    Some people live just for the fame
    Some people live for the power
    Some people live just to play the game

    Some people think that the physical things define what's within
    And I have been there before, and that life's a bore
    So full of the superficial

    Some people want it all
    But I don't want nothing at all
    If it ain't you baby
    If I ain't got you baby
    Some people want diamond rings
    Some just want everything
    But everthing means nothing
    If I ain't got you

    Some people search for a fountain
    That promises forever young
    Some people need three dozen roses
    And that's the only way to prove you love them

    Hand me the world on a silver platter
    And what good would it be
    With no one to share, with no one who truly cares for me

    o0o yea I feel like crying b cuz I am watching Mona Lisa Smile and Ray and I watched this b cuz I was upset and I didnt wanna see some guy movie so he took me 2 see it. And he fell asleep on my shouldr and he drooled on it. I know it sounds nasty. But it was kinda sweet to me. lol. God I miss him so fuckin much!

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