|Current mood:|| thoughtful|
|Current music:||This Wheel~John Mayer|
A Few Months Too Late.....
Hello, Charles. Today I was thinking about Yamil. First of all, let me say....I am in no way emotinally attatched to this guy...or physically even....but there's sumthin about him. I'm not all crazy over him and he doesn't make my heart skip a beat or anything but I had hope in the guy. We met in the summer thanks to my friend at the time Michelle. She had been trying to hook me up with him for months during our sr. year but I wuz all into Robbie. She would alwayz be like, "Cynthia, he's perfect for you! He's tall...skinny...played football...he's your Abercrombie & Fitch guy that you've alwayz wanted." I alwayz put it off cuz I had hope in Mr. Robbie but that didn't end up happening so during the summer I finally agreed to meet him. For the first two weeks he wuz so charming. I couldn't believe that HE was talking to ME. He wuz sooo hot! 6'3'', thin....did I mention HOT?! But....he has a ghost of his own. See....the girl who was first runner up to me in Miss South Texas Teen 2003 (cuz I wuz the winner YAY!) was his girlfriend when I won. So u know...he went to see her and watched me win...but he wuz really in love with her. She ended up breaking his poor lil Yamil-heart and now he is forever soured by girls. The thing is...if ONLY i had met him my junior year after Kyle and I broke up...it would've been perfect. I could've prevented him from meeting Laura (First runner up)...granted if he even liked me or wutever. The weird thing is...Laura and I are almost exactly alike...only I'm the blonde version from Mission. We're the same height, weight, body type, sense of humor....we would even say the same things at the same time. It was crazy...we would even call each other our sisters.
If only I had met him after Kyle and I had broken up. Yamil held a lot of potential to be the next great boyfriend in my life. When we first met...one of the thoughts I got was, "This is going to be the next guy I kiss....this is going to be the next guy I love!" We just clicked so well. But Laura really messed him up. If I had met him junior year...I wuold've met him while he wuz in his "commitment-stage" still. I know that I would've liked him cuz he's very much my type. I would've been a great girlfriend to him. I'm very faithful...a very good girlfriend. At least I think I am..or wuz...it's been two years since my last relationship. See....Kyle f*cked me up in many ways but I don't let that ruin my chances at landing anyone else...unlike Yamil.....he just won't let the ghost of Laura die. Even though he says he's over her. I still live with my ghost but I don't let it interfere with the other parts of my life. My ghost has a special place in me...that I talk about with no one...that I keep to myself because that's where it belongs...with me and only me. But ya....I met Yamil a few months too late.
I bought a new white sweater from the GAP cuz the heater ruined my yellow one!!! it wuz really funny.
Luv ya Charles.
That my life's gonna see
The love I give
Returned to me....