She never stumbles, she's got no place to fall (___insatiable) wrote, @ 2012-05-26 23:23:00

I haven't used this thing in a while, but A took my car and I left my moleskin in the front seat.

I get all grumpy when he goes out and I stay home alone. He's going on a bike ride/hike tomorrow morning and it's things like that that get me down in the dumps.

I kind of hate being pregnant sometimes.
We don't hang out too much anymore because I get so tired late at night, so he goes out and I stay home by myself with the cats, or I'll go to bed before him because i get bored watching him play video games.

I never let him see me naked anymore if I can help it because I feel so gross, with my belly popping out and other things that my pregnant body does/has. We never have sex anymore. I just blow him all the time to hopefully keep him satiated and myself feeling physically wanted. I want to have sex, but I just don't feel attractive and I don't think he even really wants to have sex with me.

It makes me so depressed. I know it's just hormones.

I was childishly hoping that now that we have internet he would want to come home tonight and we could cuddle and watch a movie or something on netflix but he said he was too wired and needed to go out.

i'm really happy that he has taken to our new home and he has his two friends and his job and he's fitting in just fine.

It's summer time and I still have until August to pop this baby out and I just want to go on hikes and swim naked in the river and have wild and uninhibited sex with my man but I just go to work, come home with feet so sore and swollen that I can't even walk straight, go about cleaning the house, and then fall into bed by myself.

I'm just feeling sorry for myself right now, I really have no reason to be sad. Everything went so smoothly with our move, our baby is doing fine. I'm with my family again. I just wish him and I had more time together by ourselves because when the baby comes, it will be a rare moment when we get a chance to be alone. But I can't force him to do anything.

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