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[05 May 2003|01:04am] |
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003 still hasn't come back and we can't find him anywhere. I hope he's ok. Watari and I went out for a bit looking for him and to find some stuff for my room. It feels so lonely in there without anything on the wall. We found this neat store where I found a couple of watercolor paintings of sheet music and a violin turned into a lamp. We went there after we went to the movies. ;;;; We saw a romantic movie and well Watari put his arm around me. I felt that warmth again. There was this guy behind us though that thought it was digusting. I scared him off though after I told him shut up. Watari and I went back home and we bought some pastries from the baker and had those. After that, we sat down to watch some TV. Nothing on as usually and I turned on the radio. Watari sang a little lullaby that his mom use to sing. It was so nice to hear it and it just relaxed me so much. . . . Watari kissed me again. I didn't resist. It was so wonderful. My head felt heavy and he was trying to pull me up to breath. He pulled away and we just kinda sat there looking at each other. . . I got up and went to my room though. I don't understand this warmth that I get from him. I know he loves me but do I really love him or do I just feel his love. . . I don't know. . . .
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| Revenge. |
[05 May 2003|10:33am] |
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I'm calm now.
I was livid and seething on Sunday, when I found out that Sokachan was HISOKA, thanks to Watari's potion. Not only did I saw embarrassing things to 'Soka', but now Hisoka knows I named Soka-chan after him. ~_~ It wasn't....too bad in retrospect.... I guess. Hisoka and I had a long talk after I woke up Sunday evening. (Watari tranquilized me.... I can't blame him, I was about ready to kill him. Again.)
He told me he understands me a little better now. He told me he didn't mean to hurt my feelings over the 'Muraki' alikeness thing. He said that it was just a bit of an emotion, something everyone has but it just startled him. And, evidentally, as a cat he couldn't use his powers. So he had a chance for the first time in his life to feel nothing but his own emotions.
He never said much more but... I think he understands my feelings now. And his own.... Whatever those may be I'm not sure. But... He let me kiss him again. He's very cute when he blushes... <3
Oh yes, 003 is missing. Or had been. XD He's been visiting a girl owl in a tree outside our new apartment. Heheh, it was raining last night so he stayed at our house. To get back at Watari, Hisoka and I baked a small fryer chicken about the same size as the owl and presented it to him the next morning with many apologies... (We told him that we had been making dinner, and 003 had stayed with us and must have accidentally gotten into the oven.) Watari bawled his eyes out, till 003 fluttered in, hooting at him.
^_^ I think we got him back.
Tatsumi scolded us for playing pranks at the office, but... well, you know. He sorta deserved it. We didn't tell Tatsumi that though. Hisoka's STILL angry at Watari, and won't go near him. But he seems a little less hostile towards Hijiri now. Which is good, right? Eventually he'll stop being mad at Watari. No one can be mad at him long. He's too nice. A little forgetful, but nice.
I feel a little bad now......
I think I'll go give him some cake.
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| ha ha ha. . . very funny. . . |
[05 May 2003|03:55pm] |
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-_- I'm a bit surprised by the sick practical joke that Tsuzuki and Hisoka played on Watari. To stoop so low as to make Watari think that they had baked 003, was very unlike them. I think Watari was about to have a nervous breakdown or something. It was a good thing that 003 come in when he did, or else Watari would be very upset right now and would most likely blow up the lab. I'm still glad to see that 003 is back though. We may have started off on the wrong foot but he's a cute little owl. Anyways, it's good for him to be back. Watari and I were worried over him. I think I'll pick him up something special from the pet store on my way home from training. I hope I finish with that soon. well in a way I am anyways. I still don't know if I'm going to be transferred. Tsuzuki said that I shouldn't be since this department doesn't have many employees and they need all the help they can get. I hope so but I won't know till after I've finished my training. I'm progressing quite well from what I'm being told. . . . I can't shake that feeling though that I'm going to be transferred. I don't know why but I wish I could. I like being here. Even with all the events that have happened I feel very safe here with Tsuzuki, even Hisoka, Tatsumi-san, and Watari. . . how do I feel about him. . . I still can't sort through my feelings. I care about him and everything, it feels right to be with him, but something tells me no. . . I don't know what it is but . . . anyways. back to work.
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[05 May 2003|04:46pm] |
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Forgiveness is not something that comes easily to me. I had to deal with a lot of hatred and negativity while I was alive. I'm trying to put it behind me now, but I have still not forgiven it. It will be a long time before I forgive Watari for what he did. It isn't just what happened to me that made me so angry, but what happened to Tsuzuki was just as bad. I had never seen him so angry as when he found out what Watari had done. Before that he was worried sick, wandering all around the Meifu looking for me. He didn't even eat. It was disturbing to say the least.
We got even with Watari. He was probably almost as worried about that stupid owl of his as Tsuzuki was about me. I doubt he's learned his lesson, though. He'll be back to making those potions of his too soon.
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